I don’t know about you but I sometimes feel like how I think other people think I am. I know, I know – that’s called mind-reading and I can’t really read anyone’s mind and so I’m wrong. But that’s how I feel.
For example, if I’m in a field of old people I think that I’m old. And I know this is the wrong kind of example and it doesn’t really fit; but I still do.
A better example is if I’m sitting on a bench in a playground (unlikely, I know) I feel like a paedophile. And yeah, I know I’m not supposed to say things like that; but I still do.
Did you hear the one about the vegan who went to a cannibal wine bar? One of the cannibals went up to him and said “you can’t be in here. this place is not for vegans. it’s only for cannibals” and the vegan said “Uh, actually I’m meeting a friend” and the cannibal smiles and says “that’s okay then. welcome to the club!”
And yeah, I just made up that joke (all by myself, without any help) but it kinda supports my point: other people will see what they want to see when they look at you.
I was chatting with my wife yesterday and …
What do mean? We do sometimes chat you know. It’s not all raised voices and thrown slippers!
Anyway, I was telling her that, with me it’s sometimes that thought that something is X, Y or Z that bothers me rather than something actually being X, Y or Z.
For example, I have an ulcer in my mouth that’s been raising itself up into a bump at (seemingly) random times. I thought it might be something I was eating, but there doesn’t seem to be a pattern about that (yet). It’s almost as if it’s the thought that something is going to bump it up that does that. That said, perhaps I’ll find that it’s umami flavours or msg or acids that are the culprits. Who knows.
A better example is things that make my nose run and eyes itch. You ever see a bunch of flowers that set your nose off only to find that they are plastic? Or has someone said that they’re going to light an incense stick and your eyes have started itching – before they’ve even taken the incense out of the cupboard?
Yeah, me too.
Funny, innit.
I was walking by the river today and an idea occurred to me that linked the ‘mind-reading’ and the ‘thoughts rather than the evens’ idea into one concept that would change everything!! It would transform me and the entire world would benefit in deep and profound ways.
I was going to make a note of it on my phone but then I thought ‘aw c’mon, Robert, you’re not going to forget that, it’s brilliant!
But guess what.
Yeah, that.
And the moral of the story is: stop thinking so darned much.
levishedated 