Hi, my name is Sheena. You might remember me from a story that that Robert wrote called Breathe.
To cut a long story short, I had a fling with Mark that didn’t end well. It was bad enough for me, but far, far worse for him I suppose.
Anyhow, the reason I’m writing to introduce myself today is that I got some feedback saying that I was not a sympathetic character in that story, so I want to set the record straight – I’m a nice girl. So there.
Now, before you get your mind into all kinds of trouble by wondering how a fictional character (moi) can get feedback from a reader (toi) consider this: how is it that you are still reading this when you know that it’s impossible for me to give you feedback on my feedback. That’s gotta make you some kind of nut, right?
Oh, okay, wait – I sense you might be offended by a figment of someone’s imagination calling you a nut. Well let me say this then … I’m not the one writing this. It’s really Robert. I’m the nice girl, remember! He’s the one calling you a nut. C’mon, Robert – step out of the shadows there.
Listen, he was there a moment ago – I promise you. He said something about … Ah. I can’t remember. He definitely said somet … Wait – why are you looking at me like that? I’m not crazy! He was here!!
Oh gosh, why is it so dark in here? Can’t a girl get a candle? It’s funny to feel like a candle. Funnier still to feel like a candle flame.
Think of me, Robert.
Think of the story of me.
Think of the guttering flame of my life.
Think of how I feel, all alone, here in the dark, so scared.
I’m afraid that if you stop thinking about me then I’ll just go ou …