character sketch – dark howl

 

He was a dark howl from the shadows with seething face and piercing eyes. He revelled as women shrank from his stare and scorned the eyes that returned to his – fearful yet fervourous.

Ten pm at the market – scanning shelves for  fresh meat. Tanned and toned in tight, white shirt, he panthered towards her through serengeti streets.

Doe eyed and gazelled, in short skirt and tight top atop balcony bra – she was food, drink and pure prey to his predator mind. A word, a headlight smile and she was under the wheels – bloodied by his charm – torn to pieces on his arm.

Next day news. She screamed from the headlines, coughed blood through coffee, was muffled by muffins and silenced by Sudoku.

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13 thoughts on “character sketch – dark howl

  1. A very nice person indeed. I could wish that one day this person would meet (meat?) up with someone who could take him down or at least give him a decent run for his dinner. I would love to read about that! I do love the way you described him though. It painted a very good picture of this person.

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  2. Sorry, Robert, that’s not a story – it’s pure poetry, alliteration an’ all.
    That said, I just loved your imagery; the headlight smile, the bloodying charm. So very unusual and at the same time totally in place. You’re a genius.
    Alas, geniuses are too often misunderstood. So would you please enlighten me as to the meaning of your last paragraph? 🙂

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    • Last paragraph? Erm – newspaper headlines the next morning – somebody reading through their paper whilst eating breakfast. She’s dead, the reader has lost interest by the time he has started doing the Sudoku. Short little attention span. Today’s news is tomorrow’s cat litter tray liner.

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      • Totally awed now. I’d never have guessed, and yet it makes so much sense now you explain it all. Yup, each of your stories is a true gem.

        And yet, I seem to recall a ‘substandard’ comment … was that you being ironic, way too modest or totally unaware of your own exceptional skills? 🙂

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      • Option three – totally unaware. I found what I wrote to be clumsy and ineffectual. It took a lot of moving about of words to get even as far as I did and that’s not how it usually happens. Usually it just flows. I got rusty I guess. Glad you like it though!

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  3. Very nice. Short but compelling none the less. Truly animalistic.

    Tanned and toned in tight, white shirt, he panthered towards her through serengeti streets – This I love, the rhythm and alliteration is sublime. You can feel the big cat stalking, impressive mental imagary.

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    • Hiya Kevin – nice of you to pop over – the kettle’s on and there are choccie biscuits in the cupboard over there.
      It actually took me a while to get this one down so I’m please you like it. I had to punch through a bit of a writer’s block to get there.
      Thanks again.

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  4. I’m not sure if I have something delicious in the pipeline but I am rewriting a story I wrote for class. I am also busy with Christmas stuff so I don’t get as much done as I would like. When I get writers block I generally move on to another story for a bit. I have four or five ideas that I can work on so I do have some choices. Sometimes I wake up in the morning and there are new ideas clamoring to be heard. Some are brand new and others are about what I’m stuck on. I write them down before I get up out of bed. I look at them later on and some are good and some are not so good. I save everything I write though even if I’m not sure I like it.

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    • I find that here’s something monstrous about throwing away any kind of writing – I abhor doing that and save everything. It sounds like you have more ideas than I do though – I tend to think things up on the hoof, so to speak. Perhaps even thinking is the wrong word – more often than not the characters spring to life (almost) fully formed and then just develop according to whatever plot seems to suggest itself. The ending then somehow suggests itself about three quarters of the way through.
      A thought just popped into my mind that I’m accessing real people’s stories from another dimension … Not sure if I really believe this or whether it’s a story I’m meant to write.
      Good luck on the rewrite Orpha – and the other ideas – and the other stuff clamouring to be heard. Let me know when you post something and I’ll pop over. 😉

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      • Odd that you should have a thought about stories coming from another dimension. Now I KNOW you are my kind of person. I have had that same thought myself. I have posted the original story on my blog. https://orpha2.wordpress.com/2015/12/08/
        It needs a lot of work and I am busily doing that. I would love to have comments from you though. It’s not a bit like my other stuff so be warned.

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